Sometimes, (a lot of the time,) this isn’t easy. I am a difficult woman. However, your willingness (and anxiousness even) to buy a Christmas tree on a whim to put up well over a month before the Holidays. Traveling to Texas and fitting all of yours and mine into one piece of luggage. Your support and infinite desire to see me succeed. Even when that means you must tighten your grip when I weep myself into cold sweats and then to sleep. Your ability to hush the doubt and to chase away the apprehension in the cavity of my stomach - You’ve always been the better one at making those cold weather feelings dissipate - Your understanding when the dirty dishes pile up and even more so your eagerness to help me keep our home clean. The mornings in our feathered bed underneath the hand stitched blue and peach quilt, the kitten pouncing around our heads as we try desperately to move closer while dodging paws. The peppermint hot cocoa dates. The love notes on the chalk board. The honest “I’m sorrys.” The back rubs, the team teaching our five-year-olds, & the constant day dreaming with the added solidity of our plans in our future together - is what makes the bitter stricken, silent nights, (more than) worth it.

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